Join a Table


F***. You’re here.

As a community born of loss, we know this tribe comes with a huge price of entry. We’re really glad you’re here. And we’re sorry for what’s brought you here, too.

The Dinner Party is a space where people in their 20s and 30s who have experienced the loss of a parent, sibling, partner, child, other close family member, or close friend meet on an ongoing basis to #realtalk about loss and life after. Thinking about joining the club? Read on.

Am I signing up for a one-time dinner?

Nope. Each Dinner Party table meets an ongoing basis: Most tables meet every month or two, but some folks decide to meet quarterly or meet less often as time goes on, depending on the preferences of the group.

The first step to joining a table is to fill out the submission form below. From there, a member of our team will match you to a table nearby, as soon as there’s an open seat.

Is there a cost to joining?

Yes. We have a $35 per year membership fee. As a nonprofit, The Dinner Party relies on community support to keep our doors open; to train and onboard new volunteer Hosts; to read each Dinner Partier application; to match Dinner Partiers to tables; to coach, troubleshoot, and support Dinner Party tables over time; and to change the culture around grief and loss so that it sucks less for 20-and-30-somethings going through it.

Starting March 2019, we’re asking for a $35 annual membership fee upon getting matched to a table, to cover a portion of everything it takes to make this possible. (Want more on where your money goes? Peek our 2018 Impact Report.)

One thing: All dinners remain potlucks, and all hosts are volunteers. Don’t stress it: The actual food is the least important part. A loaf of bread or a bottle of wine and you’re good!

One other thing: If $35 is a financial burden, simply click on the opt-out button, no questions asked. We’ve created a scholarship fund to ensure that money is never a barrier for joining a Dinner Party table.

I’ve experienced a major non-death-related loss. Can I join?

We understand all too well that loss takes on innumerable forms: break-ups and divorce, infertility and abortion, job loss and incarceration, to name a few. That’s part of why we’re creating TDP Labs, as a way to see how our methodology and the principles that make it work might apply to other experiences people tend to carry alone.

However, we have limited capacity at present, and hence only have the ability to serve mostly 20- and 30-somethings who’ve experienced a major death loss via official Dinner Party tables.

Learn more about joining a table here



Thank you so much for applying to join The Dinner Party! Please know that our staff (all of whom have experienced significant loss themselves) read every single application, and appreciate and honor the vulnerability that it takes to fill out a form.

Because we curate each table in our nearly 100 locations worldwide by hand and want to conduct this process with care, please note that you may not hear from our staff about a "table placement" for anywhere between 6 to 8 weeks as we find a table that's a good fit for you.

We currently take into consideration factors like:

  • Geography (where do you live and where are you willing to travel?)

  • Who/what/when of your loss

  • If there are enough people who have applied to host a table in your city that we have a place to connect you or if we need to recruit more hosts to meet the need

  • Passions and interests outside the table

Why do we take these things into consideration? Because our goal is not just to send you to a one-time event, but to help you find "your" people. People you can build community with over time. People who can be your "loss anchors" when no one else seems to understand. We know this takes more time and goes against our one-click culture, but in the current age of loneliness and isolation, we know that it's worth it.

Also note that depending on your location, we may not be able to offer you a Dinner Party table at this time. Everything we do is in response to demand and over the last few years, we've learned that trying to make a table work when there aren’t enough people invested in a location can leave people feeling more isolated after loss rather than less (which kinda defeats the purpose of Dinner Party-ing, no?).

If we can't match you a table, you will still receive an email from us with recommended Dinner Partier resources and other ways to be involved!

Thank you again for your interest in The Dinner Party!

Let’s get started…

Name *
I give permission for The Dinner Party to email me. *
Date of Birth *
Date of Birth
Gender [can check multiple] *
Sexual Orientation [can check multiple] *
Race and/or Ethnicity [can check multiple] *
Religious/Spiritual Identification [can check multiple] *
If inside the U.S., leave blank.
Do you have a car of access to a car? *
What's your primary experience with loss?
What’s been most helpful to you in working through your loss (i.e. therapy, grief groups, yoga, writing, friends)? Have you talked with friends or family about your loss? Do you feel comfortable talking openly about loss with others?
What are you passionate about? How do you choose to spend your weekends? Is there a particular community with whom you self-identify, and would like to connect with? Please let us know if you have any access needs that The Dinner Party staff or Hosts should know about.
We ask that you only sign up to Join a Table if you think you’d like to attend a dinner party at least quarterly (4x a year) moving forward. Consistency is key, friends! So, ideally, how frequently would you want to get together? *
If there are no tables available in your area, would you be interested in serving as a volunteer host? This commitment involves planning/organizing dinners every 1-2 months, providing private space (i.e. an apartment or home, no matter how small!) for dinners, and lightly facilitating conversations based on training and recommendations from the TDP HQ staff.
How did you hear about The Dinner Party *
While we can't commit to making these offerings available across the wider TDP world, if available in your city or region, would you be interested in joining...